The President's New Dog

You've probably heard of "The New Deal". Well, let me introduce you to "The Raw Deal". The Raw Deal is basically what I'm getting every waking minute of every single day of my life! I just can't get a fair shake. I always thought that if a dog could get a fair shake anywhere, it would be in the White House.

Then I heard that President Obama was going to adopt a dog that really needed a good home. I so hoped it would be me. I thought that, just maybe, he would notice my ceaseless efforts in support of the Clear Skies Initiative. I thought he would hear my bark across the miles, and rescue me from this dump. I could have helped him so much! I could have basically replaced the Secret Service. No one can bark their little head off like I can. No one!

It must have been my stump. Liberals are so anti-docking. I hate my stump. I hate myself. I can't even look in mirror anymore. All I see is a failure, a reject, a dog who never got a fair shake. The pathetic thing is....I still love Obama.

SOMEDAY A SCHIPPERKE WILL BE IN OFFICE

Yeah, I used to hope that someday a Schipp would take office, and there would be some real changes around here. Now I know the exact day that will happen:

"When I was still a rather precocious young man, I already realized most vividly the futility of the hopes and aspirations that most men pursue throughout their lives."
--Albert Einstein

I feel ya, bro....

I don't really know this guy in the YouTube video posted below, but I think we would be pretty good friends, because a lot of my dreams go this way...a twinge, a twitch, a spontaneous moment of clarity and vision that's indecorously followed by a spastic expenditure of motion that goes nowhere...my initial enthusiasm is then quickly replaced by a brief, tenuous, confused hope that shatters as the great wall of reality sends me stumbling back into the stark and barren landscape that is my life...I feel ya, bro....